My Random Blog

It’s Wednesday and I don’t have a hangover. I thought I’d take a Tuesday off from Sex with Sly (it’s a shooter) and see what it’s like to not feel like ass in the middle of my week. I like it, but not enough to not do the usual next week. Or Saturday night, after work.

I’ve successfully been avoiding Hot Future Doctor. I don’t know how to tell him that I’m just not that into him. Honestly, I don’t feel like having “that talk”. I’m not really good with those. Luckily, he’s been keeping busy with other friends, and family. He’s leaving Sunday and I look forward to having our long-distance friendship back. It was awesome to see him but I’m over it now.

I think I’ll be getting a new roommate in a couple of months. A close girlfriend is looking to move out of where she is now and has asked me if I’d like to get a place with her. I think I would like to. She’s a very cool chick and we get along wonderfully, so if I was gonna live with a friend- it would be her. Looks like it’s gonna be. Think of all the money I’ll save by drinking at home!

In addition to life away from my computer, I’ve been hanging out at Crackberry.com more than I’d like to admit. It started with me and a friend not being able to add each other to our BB Messenger contacts, and sort of took on a life of it’s own. There are some very nice, helpful people there. If you have a Berry- I’m highly recommending checking it out. Just be warned it can become as addictive as a BlackBerry. But only if you’re a big fucking nerd like me.

I’m off to clean my room and do some laundry. I’m a pimp, I know.

Peace and life.

I had an actual “date” with Hot Future Doctor last night. He picked me up about 9 (I had to get work out of the way first) and we headed out to get something to eat, since I was borderline starving. We did our usual, silly, sarcastic banter in the car on the way there- which was fun. That continued over dinner, between actual conversation about what we’ve been up to the last decade or so. It was nice hanging out with an old friend and having lots to talk about.

After dinner we decided to catch a movie, so we settled on “Hancock”, since I’d never seen it and Will Smith has rarely made a movie I didn’t like. Since H.F.D. took care of dinner, I took care of the movie and munchies. I don’t like it when a guy pays for everything we do. I also don’t accept drinks from guys without buying them one in return. That’s just how I roll.

Anyway- I wasn’t into the movie at all and was, in fact, getting really tired. (I still love Mr. Smith, but this won’t be a movie I’ll ever watch again.) H.F.D. said we could leave, but I wanted to stick it out. I was curious, after all, as to how the movie was going to end.

During a particularly non-exciting part of Hancock, something started nagging at me… I just wasn’t feeling this. Not just the movie, but Hot Future Doctor. He’s attractive, he’s sweet, he’s funny, successful and he’s clearly driven. I’ve known him forever, I enjoy his company, we’re great friends and the sex has always been fantastic, but there’s something missing. For lack of a better word: Butterflies.

I just don’t feel that spark with him. There were times throughout the date when I noticed something was “off”, but it wasn’t until the movie that I started analyzing it. I’m just not that into him. I wish I could force myself to feel differently, but that’s just not possible.  I need the butterflies and I deserve them. H.F.D. is perfect for someone. Just not me. At the end of the date, he drove me home and I kissed him goodbye.

I’m a little disappointed, but I’m also optimistic. There IS someone out there who will fill me with butterflies. I look forward to meeting him.

Peace and knowing what you need.

P.S. I’ve changed my header for the last time. I swear.

I hadn’t realized how long it’s been since I’ve blogged until I stumbled in here today and saw some comments from my fave bloggy friends. Thanks for missin’ me, y’all. I just haven’t felt like being on my computer in a while.

I’ve continued on with my Tuesday tradition of hanging out at New Fave Watering Hole where my girl Sly is bartending now. I’ve managed to recruit several girlfriends, and now it’s a full-blown party every Tues. SO fun. In addition to Tues. fun, I’ve also found myself out and about on random other days of the week as well. That’s pretty much the life of working nights in this business and being friends with all your co-workers. There’s always something to do, and someone to do it with.

I even met a cute guy last Tuesday. We talked for a while the night we met and he is VERY cute, but he was kinda drunk so his conversational skills weren’t that fabulous. I didn’t mind, though… I had a nice time just looking at him; his smile is quite fabulous. I hung out with him again last night. I suspect I’ll be seeing him this Tuesday as well, which is a good thing… Hopefully.

I finally ran into my kissing partner Tuesday night as well. I hadn’t seen him since that last lip-lock marathon we had. We smiled, we said hi, and then I promptly forgot he was even there. He remains a very cool guy, though, so I intend to remain friendly with him- but I will be keeping my lips to myself.

Tomorrow is the longest night of my working week and I’m dreading it already. Hopefully I’ll be busy and time will fly. I don’t intend to be back out in the world until Tuesday so I should be hangover free until Wednesday. However, somehow I seem to keep ending up having beers with co-workers after a long Sat. night.

I’m gonna try to catch up with some blog reading before I crash for the night… I’ll try to get all caught up on Monday. Hopefully I won’t end up disappearing again.

Peace and fun, fun, fun.

Well since my virus took over, I have chosen to use my computer as little as possible. I just don’t feel like dealing with it anymore. I’m sick of spending money on programs that aren’t taking care of the whole problem. So fuck it, for now.

After returning from my beach trip, I decided to un-kink my life. Shit with my ex-friend was stressing me out and keeping me in a bad mood most of the time. It’s been more stressful since one of our mutual (and much loved) friends has been feeling the effects of it too. Since I am responsible for my own happiness, I decided to let her live and move forward.

Sat. night after work I hung out with friends and ex-friend was also there (she called first to make sure I wasn’t going to hurt her) and I made the effort to get along with her. I still don’t trust her as far as I can throw her (I don’t know when I will be able to again) and we’ve yet to sit down and have a much-needed conversation, but it’s nice to not have that active drama floating around me 24-7. It’s draining and I’m over it. Life is just too fucking short- ya know?

There’s still a couple of other things I need to un-kink, but nothing as stressful as the situation with the above mentioned, so I’m not freaking out about it. I’ll handle those things whenever the opportunities present themselves.

I’ve been laying low since Saturday. I haven’t felt like being out in the world and it’s been VERY nice just hanging out at home and decompressing. Except for a night at work, text messages and a trip to the tanning place (don’t start), I’ve been pretty anti-social. Sometimes I just get that way for a couple of days or so. Usually once a month. Hmmm…

Hot Future Doctor will be in town in a couple of weeks, so I’ve been trying to get my ass on the treadmill for at least 30 minutes a day. If only I could stop eating shitty food too. It sucks for me that I LOVE BBQ sauce and everything that’s traditionally drenched it in. My ass is not amused.

I gave my shift to another girl at work, tonight, so I’m OFF and think I’ll grab some girls and head over to that other fave watering hole and see my girl Sly. I feel like having some Sex With Sly tonight. (It’s a shooter, for those who have never been here and just pissed yourselves.)

I’ll be back tomorrow with stories and photos.

Peace and bring it on… I’m ready.

Well it seems that I have managed to rid myself of the million baby virus’s that my one virus immediately gave birth to, once it landed in my hard drive. However, I have still been enjoying the gift that keeps on giving… Adware. I feel like my laptop has Herpes or something.

I NEVER use Internet Explorer, but it managed to pop up from time to time to flash me ads for… oh the irony…anti-virus software. I’ve since disabled access to it, so I’m not getting that headache anymore. However, whatever program that I can’t rid myself of has hijacked my Firefox browser as well. The only one I can use without getting pop-ups and re-directs is Safari. Imagine that. I suppose that’s because EVERYTHING Microsoft has holes and security defects and pretty much throws “Come Fuck Me Up” parties for every virus known to man. However my future husband, Steve Jobs, managed to do just the opposite. I need a Mac and I need it NOW.

So far I have AVG Free, Spyware Doctor, CyberDefender and Error Expert running on my machine. They still can’t get rid of whatever adware program is still fucking with me. So I am now going to go down my list of comments (from my last post) and start downloading the recommended programs as well. THANK YOU to everyone who left a comment on my last post. Your support and suggestions are VERY appreciated.

On a happier note... I just spent a few glorious days on the coast and had a kick-ass time. I desperately needed to get to the ocean and decompress from life. It was SO nice to get the fuck out of this city and away from work and bullshit. (I uploaded a few pics to Flickr, for the curious.) Unfortunately, I’m back in reality now and expect to not be thrilled about that for at least a week.

Peace, mini holidays and clean computers.

Well now that I’ve popped several blood vessels on my blog, I think I can chill out a bit over That Bitch Formerly Known As My Friend.

I went to work tonight expecting That Bitch to be there, but it was her night off. I’ll see her tomorrow, however. Everyone at work knows what’s going on and I was, honestly, surprised at how many people cannot stand her. I suppose they never expressed that to me before because her and I were friends. It was quite the interesting revelation. I almost feel sorry for her, being that all but one member of tonight’s staff wants to see her get injured. Then I remember that she brought all this shit on herself and any pity quickly dissolves. I knew she was a bitch, but I didn’t realize how shitty she had been to nearly everyone that works with us, at some point or another. Even people who remain her “friends” have been quick to comment about how fast she’s burning bridges these days.

She sent me a text this morning asking me “what the fuck” I was talking about and if I wanted our friendship to end then fine. I fired back with, and I am rewriting this verbatim:

You know exactly what I’m talking about you fucking worthless two faced bitch. I can’t wait to show you just how “all talk” I am. Next time you talk shit about me make god damn fucking sure it doesn’t get back to me.

My most mature moment in life? GOD no. But it made me feel better to spew it at her anyway. She never did respond.

Anyway… Last night, before posting angry, I went out and had some fun. I went to see Sly at her new job but Vanilla was there with his poor girlfriend and I had to go. I ended up meeting up with BFF and friends at Fave Watering Hole. It was all a nice distraction from That Bitch. But then I got home, started thinking about her again and managed to light myself on fire. I’ve reached a point now where I can flame up when I need to- and not when I don’t. I was actually in a stellar mood all night at work.

Ok, I’m tired and hungover and I desperately need to get some sleep.

Peace and knowing who your friends are.

Here’s the thing: I am FIERCELY loyal to my friends. I have been in physical fights for them, been there for them, nurtured them, bailed them out of jail, taken them out when they needed a good drunk, etc. I am a GREAT friend to have. I am the first to admit this because I have learned a LOT about friendship over the years and I’ve learned what it takes to be a great one. I’ve also learned what it takes to be a shitty one.

I have a shitty one in my midst. I’ve been friends with this chick for about 2 years now and we have several mutual friends. She happens to be a huge bitch. Normally, I don’t mind this quality- as “bitch” can take many forms- and most of them I’m ok with. However, talking shit like we’re in high school is not one of them. Anything you can’t say to ME should not be said. Especially to a third party. I adhere to this rule, therefore I expect that of my friends.

It has come to my attention that my (not cool) bitch friend has had a lot of shitty things to say about me, to another mutual friend. Normally, I would let this go as an immature friend that needs a good talking to. But I know this bitch, and she’s beyond “talking to”. I also know that the information I’ve been given is 100% accurate. (If I didn’t know that, this would not be an issue.) And I am pissed off. Finally. And I’ve called her out. Which means I’ve asked her to challenge me to my face. Normally I would call the “friend” and ask for an explanation, but since she thinks I’m “all talk”, I thought I’d allow her to prove that to me.

For the record: I do NOT advocate physical violence. I would much rather talk our shit out than fight. However, I have an EXCELLENT track record when it comes to beating a bitch down (I’ve only lost ONCE). I’ve been doing it since I was 14 years old and I have pretty much fucking MASTERED it. Just because I am pretty doesn’t mean I can’t kick your ass. Ask my mom. She hates that about me.

Peace and don’t make me hurt you. Unless you like that.