Drunk Posting
Turns out cute neighbor’s friend is married. I figured this out when I almost ran them over with my car as I was backing out of my garage. I apologized, once out of my garage, for almost running them over. She was super sweet. I now feel like an asshole for having thought her husband was cute.
My ex has completely and totally moved on. This makes me both happy for him and sad for me. He’s found the girl he will (I’ll bet you 50 bucks) marry, whereas I haven’t met a guy I would want to see past sunrise.
I am emotionally defeated. I miss D. so much that it physically hurts me. I cry more often than I’d like. I’m such a tough bitch- right? I am in such a weird fucking place right now. I want him to be happy- and I am happy for him- but I’m also so sad that I let him go. I’m crying as I write this.
Not so tough when it comes to my heart.
July 2nd, 2008 at 3:44 am
I feel your pain girlfriend… and I used to say the same thing, like I wanted my ex to be happy and I was happy for him– but it was totally just me pretending to be nice. I actually wanted him to be alone and missing me.
Anyway, now I’ve been married almost 10 years (to someone else)– and the ex is still single (and pretending to be loving it)….
And surely your guy could NOT have found Mrs. Right when he had someone as smart and witty as you.
And furthermore, if he does end up with her– that will only be because there is someone exceptionally smart, funny and successful lurking nearby who can better match and balance all of your strengths–
so ha.
f- em
Florida Girl In Sydney’s last blog post..Australians Go Wild for Gravy Flavored Chips
July 2nd, 2008 at 4:06 am
Married men should have a stamp on their head that says: Hi, I’m Married!
so we don’t have to guess.
I know your pain. Have a little cry, it will make you feel better.
Natural’s last blog post..Houston, We May Still Have A Problem?
July 2nd, 2008 at 8:22 am
Awwwww… I’m sorry Corrina! It’s not fair. You are not an asshole for being attracted to someone’s husband - you didn’t know. You’re respectful of his marriage, and that’s good. He should have told you sooner. Or worn his ring more conspicuously. (Hint: if he’s nice and well-behaved, he’s been whipped into shape by his wife. Or he’s gay
But once in awhile, you’ll meet one that’s single.)
Breathe. Spend lots of time in the sunlight. Smile even though you don’t feel like it. Soon the sunlight will penetrate to your soul, and will come out again in your smile, and you will forget why you were even sad.
Meanwhile, try not to obsess on D. Focus on the people around you, and how their lives suck much worse than yours. LOL!
Marvin the Martian’s last blog post..Yard decorations, part 2
July 2nd, 2008 at 11:00 am
You are definitely not an a-hole for thinking a married man (who you didn’t know was married!) was cute. Kudos to you for being respectful of that fact, like Marvin said. Too many women are not.
As far as D goes - I know how you feel, I’ve been there. Hang in there. Time heals a lot, and it doesn’t sound like enough time has gone by for that. It sounds cliche, I know, but it’s true - there are much bigger and better things for you. You will find them.
July 2nd, 2008 at 12:09 pm
I’ve been there before and it does hurt. No matter how tough you are or try to be something like that has to sting a little. Just KNOW that everything happens for a reason and there is a reason why you are HERE. I can tell you from experience that love comes to you when you least expect it ;o) Hang in there girl! Don’t regret this crying, drunk post later you need to let it out sometimes.
Sincerely,
From a chick who’s been there.
July 2nd, 2008 at 1:32 pm
Thank you, everyone, for your kind words and encouragement. Sometimes I just need to cry and be a weepy girl and then I feel better. I do kind of wish I’d not posted this for the world to see, but I’m gonna leave it up because it’s honest.
I know time heals all- and it really hasn’t been long enough yet- so I expect to be sad again in the future too. And that’s ok. But I really DO want him to be happy. Because he genuinely deserves it. We didn’t break up because of anything he did. It was me. And from all accounts, his new girlfriend seems lovely. My friends, who have met her, said she’s super nice. They honestly deserve each other, if that’s true, b/c D. is a really sweet guy as well.
XO
Corrina
July 2nd, 2008 at 6:11 pm
{hugs} from a non-hugger
You sound like such a level-headed person, you’ll be fine … it’s important to grieve … if you don’t it comes out years later in very un-healthy ways.
DrowseyMonkey’s last blog post..Nice Girl
July 2nd, 2008 at 7:58 pm
Hang in there. I know it may not be of much help but things can only get better
Nick Phillips’s last blog post..A Watery Affair
July 2nd, 2008 at 9:34 pm
Thank you for the hugs Drowsey.
I know I’ll be ok… I just wish we could turn our feelings off sometimes.
Actually, Nick, it does make me feel better knowing things can only go up from here.
July 3rd, 2008 at 1:35 am
Aw, sweetie. (((((Big Fat Hug)))))
Leigh’s last blog post..Yay! Good News!
July 4th, 2008 at 12:27 pm
Keep your chin up - you’re cute and funny - these things work themselves out for those that are cute and funny.
July 4th, 2008 at 2:11 pm
Leigh - Thank you for the big fat hug. Those are always nice (and welcome)!
Coop - Chin is now firmly up. Thank you for the encouraging words.
July 4th, 2008 at 6:34 pm
It just shows that even tough bitches have hearts, and yours is as true as day. Luv ya girlie - your time *will* come.
*hugs*
Dette’s last blog post..She Could’ve Been in the Army
July 4th, 2008 at 7:44 pm
Thank you Dette.
My heart feels better now.